Wide Load and the Messy Mix

Life is usually a messy mix of really great things from grin to glee, and not so great things, ranging from just annoying all the way to disheartening rounding up on hopeless.

Today, yesterday, no different.

So, rather than unload the wide load, oversize dump truck right here I would like to site a funny scene from Malcolm in the Middle (Yes boys, I know, the show I wouldn't let you watch when you were little, you didn't need any more ideas...).

This is probably my favorite scene. It's Season 2, Episode 3 where Lois gives the boys money to buy something for her and they end up buying things for themselves. Then Hal forgets Lois' birthday altogether. She runs away from home. In her time of escape she goes to a batting cage to smack some anger out with bats in a legal way. Makes total sense to me.

Meanwhile Hal and the boys realize they need to get her back and they are trying to pull together a "this is all we've got but we love you" birthday celebration. Once the crazy crew locates her, she and Hal have a word at the batting cage. He says (with a high pitch intermittent squeak) something like, "we're at the top of our game here, Lois!"

She looks at him in disbelief and there are more comments I don't remember. Then, an onlooking motley clown says to her, "Listen Wide Load, the guy's just tryin to do something nice."

Hal looks intently at the clown accompanied by several other clowns. "Did you call my wife WIDE LOAD?"

A huge, hilarious brawl breaks out, shown in slow motion to the tune of a Kenny Rogers song. There is ankle biting and cake splattering with all the boys in full swing clown tackling comedy action.

Lois looks on in shock and finally, glassy-eyed admiration, for her crew who would do all this to defend her honor. Moments ago she had had it with them all, then suddenly, redemption.

Thank God life can be that way too. Redemption is always just around the corner.

Photo: a few of my crew...probably just before wrestling broke out in the living room.

Spit, Broken Hearts, and Beautiful Labyrinths

Getting some exercise changes my whole outlook and my physical disposition. So I went running again today.

When I run I often feel the need to...spit. Spit. You have to get some of the crud out of you (in the field OK, I don't what I would do if I ran in town). I've not been one to pride myself in my spitting abilities so I decided over recent months to work on this. You know, just in case a car happens to pass by while I am spitting.

I discovered that no matter how much I improve my abilities in this regard, whenever someone is in sight this is when I will not spit well. I would rather skip the detail here. I will say that on really windy days things get rather dicey and can impair one's vision if speed and direction are not properly judged...by some.

Also while I run I seem to workout my heart in an emotional way too. Issues come to the surface. Sometimes I yell (also when cars are passing).

Today in between spit practices and laughing at myself, it occurred to me that I have seen a disproportionate amount of broken hearts over the summer. Sad, lost, or wandering hearts. It has been so hard to see, and to be one of them, mostly in the sad department. It drives me to my knees begging God to do something. There is too much pain in this world.

I'm not depressed. I went running, OK? Life is good too, I just hate seeing the pain. It's been too near.

Awhile back I was talking with a young woman, and we were sharing about some of life's struggles. "It's like a labyrinth." she said.

Honestly, I wasn't completely sure what a labyrinth was. I thought it was like a maze, but I learned some very intriguing stuff. For one, I thought it was like a maze but it's different in that there is only one way to travel through a labyrinth. There are actual life size labyrinths...I mean that humans can walk through. They contain winding paths, often within a circle, that lead to the center of the brain-like framework. The main thing is to move forward. If you stood still and forgot which direction you were travelling you might go backwards. It seems that the point is, focus, move forward, and get to the center of the thing, whatever it is, then find your way back to live life. This is what I get anyway.

I don't know how these strange little pieces of debris come together in my mind, but they do. Today the collage of thought reminded me that what God cares about is hearts, especially the broken ones. In the windy, winding paths of life where I spit, He cares about hearts more than anything else.

God, guard mine, teach it, and hold it. You are the only one qualified for this job.

Photography from trevormleephotography.blogspot.com

Back-to-School Grins

We live near not too far from the site of the National Tractor Pull in Bowling Green, Ohio. Every year this crowd of ...a few really roughnecks mixed with some good ole' down home country folk, arrive on the scene of 20,000 students moving into BGSU. At Walmart local Mom's are school shopping with their youngsters, and well, when these three crowds converge you can just sit back and enjoy the show. And why not, you're going to wait in line anyway.

The dirt cloud was still clearing from the weekend, when at our house, back-to-school morning for our BGSU boy meant bringing along a gallon of water for his radiator (With a good attitude, nice job Mitch!). Yep, it's that time of year for cars again. But really, what am I talking about, it's always that time of year.

Car maintenance with our fleet of six vehicles is like health care for a 99 year old on life support. Well, maybe a little better.

But not much.

I enjoy laughing about it, obviously. I find it way more fun than crying which I've also tried. It doesn't get results.

Dave and one his best bud mechanic friends, Storm, do most of the back yard repair, bless their weeping souls.

One time we had a free coupon at Tuffy that we'd bought at a fund raising auction. Okay so it wasn't really free, it was cheap - which makes me a cheapskate because of the fundraising thing, but no one else was bidding on that basket of stuff.

When I went in for my 'free' oil change and slid that little coupon across the counter, the mechanic came out from under my car with one of those computer print outs that the diagnostic machine spits out (maybe not quite as I'm painting it but you get the picture). My report was a couple pages long. The guy gently tried to break the news to me that the repairs my car really needed exceeded the street value of my car by $1,000 at best. I just smiled at him kindly and grabbed that jewel of a document for my blog folder.

But I forgot to tell you the funny part.

When I called Tuffy to set up that appointment a few days earlier I was in the middle of a few things. Some e-mail just chimed in and the cat jumped up on my desk and was being really funny. I started talking in the voice we have for the cat. He was saying something hilarious as I recall and totally entertaining me (I should not be a ventriloquist, I would get very confused).

Then I remembered that I had dialed Tuffy.

Gasp! I put the phone to my ear hoping to hear a busy signal (if you don't know what this is look it up on YouTube) rather than a human being. Worse. I had just left a message talking like a cat, for a cat, to men who use impact wrenches.

I hung up before they could hear my real voice.

Next morning, I called back on a cell phone hoping to God that they didn't have caller ID.

I love that life's hardships also bring laughter and joy along the way, strangely, and of course volumes of story fodder as well. It reminds me of Joseph, what the enemy meant for evil, God used for good. Yep, the good stuff.

Coffee Please

Your print job is ready. No, we do not have an account for you yet.

No, we cannot laminate that.

Yes, it is raining.

It was just an annoying morning. So, I decided to cheer myself up with Starbucks while I waited for posters to get laminated (so they wouldn't pulpify in the rain....sure that's word, I just made it up).

Well, as soon as I made the decision to cheer myself up, the world cooperated with me.

This is not usually how it works, so it really caught me by surprise.

But literally, I no sooner turned on my heels after making the decision, with a heavy box full of print job, in the direction of that nearly intoxicating brew of beans, and people were opening doors and trunk lids at every turn, all going out of their way to pave my royal way.

Was there a sign on my head? I swear, I was dressed appropriately.

Even at Starbucks, a gentleman opened the door. The baristas recognized me, a regular, as I headed first to the cleanest and roomiest public restroom in town. By the time I greeted them at the counter, the cheerful cute blond girl said, "do you need anything more than your red eye?" (that's my usual coffee with an extra shot of espresso.....ummm, is there an Sbux open yet this morning?....concentrate!)

She smiled, sliding my prepared coffee toward me.

"You made my day!" I said. "I came here to cheer myself up, and you took care of that."

The guy with the cool braided hair asked what was wrong.

"Nothing big, just an icky little morning." I said.

"Because we offer counseling too." he said with a laugh in his eyes. "Spiritual help...." he grinned. I got the feeling he was genuine.

"Would this be Starbucks brainwashing?" I asked. "Because I'm good with that."

It was a nice little laugh, and the door was opened for me again as I headed out to my car.

But no one opened my car door. And that's where the time the world cooperated with me for a brief little respite, ended. But I had what I needed.

God is good with details that way.

Photo from trevorleephotography.blogspot.com

He comments: This is my Mom before coffee...actually, it was his photoshop skill.

Beauty and Affliction

According to one of my favorite authors, John Eldredge, two things pierce the heart, beauty and affliction.

Now please don't get me wrong, I know what true affliction is. I've had my share. So, thank God that today affliction looked like this. Waking up to dog blood (warning, it gets worse) speckled on the floor and a pony sized stinky pile of poop. There, I said it, one of the most taboo words - POOP.

Trying to get out the door to a meeting I was delayed a bit by a 'discussion' with my husband. Then I found the car on E. Now I was really delayed.

Later at the work office, I accidentally picked at a healing scratch on my face from when the cat bit my face the other day. Yes, my face. And now it wouldn't stop bleeding. I needed to put the tissues in the bright red bio hazard trash can. I was a hazard.

In between here somewhere there were some good parts, nice people and a laugh with a co-worker.

Later, after figuring out an insurance bill while driving home from a grocery stop in 95 degree heat, I stopped to mail the payment in the nick of time to avoid a lapse in coverage.

I arrived home sweating in my dress clothes, even in the AC somehow, only to find that one of the cats used the large indoor palm tree pot as a litter box, also that he is awful with his burying aim as evidenced by the pile of dirt on the floor and the uncovered pile of disturbing POOP. Yes, disturbing, that's all I can bear to say about that.

Some more good parts came in about this time, along with Dave and I going off on a run together. I had put a few more songs into my running playlist that I hadn't heard in a while to keep me occupied for when Dave would pass me in the run. So, 10 seconds into the run I got to let the tunes play (in one ear, don't worry). And here is where beauty pierced my heart today.

The song Hallelujah, by Kate Voegele, came on and, I don't know, maybe the serotonin was kicking in too, but I got goosebumps. "Love is not a victory march, it's a cold and a broken hallelujah." Goosebumps.

Same thing listening to Susan Boyle sing "I Dreamed a Dream" on Britain's Got Talent. Seriously, if you don't get chills listening to this, in a good way, check for dark spot on your soul.

Beauty and affliction. Two more ways God reminds me that He is here for me.

Photo by Trevor Lee, TrevorLeePhotography.com

Glimpse of the Big Picture

Recently in a group setting someone stood up intending to say nice things, but I am sure she inadvertently made a dear friend of mine feel really bad.

Another friend of mine has neighbors who built a huge barn that blocked her entire view of the sunrise. They didn't do it for that reason of course. They have no idea how upsetting this is to her, they are just doing life as best they can, really.

Last weekend, I was in line at Cedar Point for the rockin' Raptor roller coaster, which I love! First of all, the sign said 30 minutes. Second, an 11-year old girl was breathing down my back in the 95 degree heat in line, repeatedly ripping the flip flops off my feet. Thirdly, the wait was 77 minutes. Fourthly, even if did the hiked out elbow crowd trick, she breathed on my elbow. I tried to smile and be pleasant.

Talk about annoying.

Thank God for Dexter to talk to and the interesting people to distract us. The 50-year old guy who thought everyone should see his abs. The gang member looking girl who was trying to look all tough. The couple who couldn't keep their hands off each other. The couple who looked like they'd absolutely had enough of each other sometime last year. And finally, the relief of the couple who happily unloaded their anxious 11-year old daughter on the crowd ahead of them, right where I stood.

Contrast all that to the view from the top of the Giant Ferris Wheel, another favorite of mine where I love to snap a screen saver shot (probably illegal). Even the couple with the screaming kid in the car next to us couldn't be heard when we were at the top. It was quiet with a breathtaking view.

The big picture is like that I guess.

Thank God, He gives me a glimpse of the big pictures in life sometimes, because it helps me put up with all the annoying people who are waiting in the long lines like me, and just trying to live their lives. Like me.

Rotting Potatoes Don't Laugh

I was sitting out back in my white wooden Adirondack chair feeling really sad about some things a couple days ago. I noticed with curiosity a sweet potato plant that had grown out of a pot full of deadness. It was now flourishing.

I also noticed dead leaves on the peonies where I suspect the neighbor's dog/pony 'marked his territory', but that's a different story.

A few weeks prior there were these neglected sweet potatoes in the kitchen. They grew alien limb looking sprouts on them, aliens from the murky waters of Middle Earth or Death Valley or something like that.

I was about to throw them out when Dave suggested I plant them. "They'll probably grow."

So, in as much time as it would have taken to walk out back to throw them in the woods, I cut the ends off them and stuck them in a rich mucky pot of soil where another plant had died. The insides of the potatoes had begun to rot I noticed, so I didn't expect much.

I forgot all about them until weeks later, the other day, when I was sad and struggling, and I saw they had absolutely flourished.

God has a way of using His creation to speak to me, almost like He has purpose for it all. How about that, I say to myself with second level sarcasm (because I know He has purpose it in, I'm just slow to see it sometimes....).

I started thinking about the process of that sweet potato plant growing and I realized some things. First of all, isolation in the dark was a bad thing for the potato and it's a bad thing for me too. Second, sometimes we have to cut into our issues where there is rottenness. It hurts and it stinks. But if we get them into a good environment, the rich soil of truth and love, where there is light to chase away the darkness and water that keeps giving strength, then life comes out of what would have been death.

So, I chose growth and not isolation, not only for the potato but for me, and I'm glad because last night I played Apples to Apples with family and friends and laughed ridiculously loud!

amazing potato photo by shelley lee, for much better photos see www.tmleephotography.blogspot.com!